Teagan-Tooter-Betty

We were at Mom and Dad's on Saturday doing the clean-up from the garage sale madness.  James and Teagan went with either Grandma or Grandpa to drop off books at Half-Price books or take stuff to the Salvation Army.  I knew it was a mistake sending Grandma to a bookstore to get rid of 8 bins, yes 8! and not expect her to come back with anything.  She got Teagan the Tinker Bell movie as a thank you for all her help.

Grandma, Aunt Sarah, James, Teagan, and Ireson were all piled on the bed watching.  Grandpa, the studio audience, was in his reading chair and commented to Teagan, "Ya know Teagan...  All these fairies never toot."

James and Ireson busted out with a laugh and Teagan looked at Grandpa with a look of "oh please," pointed to herself and said, "Not this Fairy."

Please and Thank You Lord

I had one of those Mama moments last Sunday on the way to church.  You know- the kind that make you cry instantly, pull on your heart strings, proud as could be, can't wait to share it with people moments.  Daddy had to drive separately as I had to stay after for a meeting.  Lil' James asks, "Mom, I'm going to read to you out of my Bible on our way to church, Okay?"

"Of course!"  I said.  "What better way to help keep the focus of the day, then to start it off with scripture readings."

As I eagerly await to have my seven year old, eldest child and son begin to read to me from the Bible, I hear page flipping and "hmmm-ings."  He pipes up after a moment, "Mom does C-h-r-o-n-i-c-l-e-s spell Cronickles?"
"Yep- it sure does." I answered.
"K.  I thought so because "CH"ronicles didn't sound right."  Then he started to read to us on our most pleasant ride to church.

James was praying the other day for lunch.  We had just finished doing some school and some Bible readings.  During his prayer he asked, "And God, please help me to keep getting better at reading because some of those big words like, [Mom- what was that one today?]....."
"Warrior and adversity?" I whispered.
"Yeah, God, sorry,  warrior and adversity.  Those were kind of hard!  And help me be patient.  Amen."

Amen to that!

Ode' to Your Mama

Ireson's latest jingle dedicated to me.

I like to cuddle wiff my Mommy.
I like to cuddle wiff my Mommy.
I give her the best hugses and kissessess
'Cause I like to cuddle wiff my Moommy.  Pommy.

See Mom- I made it rhyme 'cause all my songs rhyme!

Potty Mouth

Ireson disappeared yesterday while I was outside with the kids playing and I began wondering where he had gone.  Fortunately, the windows were open and I heard a faint yelling coming from inside the house.  I went inside to investigate as I assumed he had gone to the bathroom.  He was in there yelling, "MOMMMY!  I went potty COME and WIPE MY BUTT!!!!!"  

As I commenced with my motherly duties, Ireson asked me "Am I allowed to say poop while I'm in the bafroom?  That not being crude?"
I told him as long as we need to talk about poop it's okay to talk about it while you're IN the bathroom. 

"So, I can say pees and poop when I'm in the bafroom? That okay too?"
"Yes, Ireson.  If you're not being crude you can discuss those things in the bathroom."

Looking more of a coy boy at this point he asked: "Can I say poopy butt in the bafroom?" he asked.  This comes after his brother got disciplined earlier in the day for yelling at his sister and calling her a poopy butt.  "Yes, you can say it in the bathroom." 

"Can I say penis in the bafroom den too?" he prodded as he smirked at me as though he was concocting an evil plan.

"Is there something you need to tell me about your penis?" I asked.
He replied, "No, I okay" and continued pulling up his pull-up and pants.  "Can you go out and go away now please?" he inquired as he was about to wash his hands.

So I left as he's responsible enough to finish up on his own.  I shut the door and stood there listening to him as he sang a little ditty to a sweet little tune with dramatic inflection and all.  If only the words were so sweet :)      

(Imagine him singing this with his lateral lisp)

"Poopy butt, poopy butt, penis, penis, penis, penis, a Peeeeeeniiiiiisssss!  I poop and pee in the bafroom and that's okay.  I not be crude in the bafrooooooom.  Poopy poooooopy a pooooppy buuuu......hhhhhuuuuuuttttttt.  Penis."  He turned off the water, dried off his hands, opened the door and went on his way.

Boys.  I'm glad he got more than poop out of his system in there.

Teagan's Communication Stinks

Yesterday - Teagan tooting:  "I just released my inner skunk." 
Thanks for the news flash stinky-tink.


I took the kids out for lunch today and the chairs were insanely loud on the ceramic tile floor. Teagan moved her chair and "SCREECH! Then a person way on the other side of the room moved there chair and "SCREECH!"
Teagan explained to me "that the chairs were communicating their mating calls to each other".
 
What is it with my children?!

Shepherd of My Heart

"The shepherds returned, glorifying and praising God for all the things they had heard and seen, which were just as they had been told."

We visited a sheep farm that belonged to the family through whom we purchased our latest grass-fed beef supply.  When Brad, the owner, delivered our meat a couple of weeks prior, he talked with us for 45 minutes telling us about his sheep farm.  He joyously shared with us their farming philosophies and techniques, their goals and interests and encouraged us to come out for a visit to meet their 140 sheep, including their recently birthed babies that we could bottle feed!  He was such a genuinely nice guy that I took him up on his offer and invited a friend of mine and her 3 kids to join us for a day at the sheep farm. 

Upon arrival, the kids eagerly ran up to the barn towards the direction of the loud chorus of bleating. 

The barn was packed with 140 sheep: big sheep, little sheep, white sheep, and black sheep.  The sheep were free to roam where they desired.  Brad told the kids to go absolutely where ever they wanted: up and over fences, in the stalls amongst the babies, in the barn yard amongst the big mamas, or out in the meadows and pasture.  You really don't get a good perspective of just how large a full grown sheep can be if you're standing behind a fence!  There was a separate pen where the lambs that Brad bottled fed, because their mothers didn't care for them, could jump through the fence and get some respite from the rest of the herd.  They would run up to the kids without fear and lick them and nuzzle them and eat out of their hands.

The smell was rejeuvenating.  The land was gorgeous!  Rich green grass graced the vast rolling hills and meadows.  It went on as far as the eye could see.  It was glorious!  The hills were alive with the sound of baaaaaaing...ah ah ah ahhhh. 

There was a tree line way back at the edge of the pasture and Brad told us that the property even went far beyond the wooded area and the sheep were free to roam where ever they desired.  The herd always stuck together and never strayed too far away and always returned upon hearing the shepherd's voice calling them or when ever he'd wave a white bucket in the air.  Then they would stampede back thinking that they were about to be fed.

Teagan the terrorized Betty got to experience a stampede first hand...or rather first hoof.  The boys, being boys, adopted the responsibility of shepherd with pride and testosterone fueled fervor.  They were herding the sheep as well as any ol' sheep dog could!  It was impressive!  It was one of the coolest things I've ever seen.  James said it was one of the best days of his life! 

James & his friend Solomon would drive the sheep all the way out to the far reaches of the pasture and out into the wooded area beyond where we could even see them.  My friend Jen and I were busy talking with Brad and enjoying the beauty and peace as we walked towards where they had gone.  We weren't the slightest bit concerned since we could see that the sheep were more or less afraid of the roaring boys and would go wherever they wanted and they it was evident that they would always come back to the safety and security of their shepherd and their home in the barn.  Brad kept repeating "It's okay girls, it's okay girls".  They would almost instantly calm down from the trust they had of their master.  It was almost comical to see the separation of the Ewes from their lambs and then watch as the babies would follow the sounds of their mother's beating's until they were reunited with their mothers and all was well with their world.

Teagan decided to head back up towards us ahead of the boys and herd and see what was taking us so long.  Well, we weren't the slightest bit concerned until we saw the herd of 140 sheep stampede back towards us with 3 roaring boys running after them.  Teagan was a good 100 feet or so ahead of them walking.  We saw them coming.  You don't know how fast sheep can run until you've seen a stampede.  She heard them, she felt the ground under her feet trembling.  I saw sheer terror overcome her body as she launched into in all out run to get to me in time.  We were another 100 feet away from where she was.  I yelled at her to stop and turn around because I knew that they would stop because they were more afraid of her than anything and they'd stop before they got to this huge puddle/pond that was at the bottom of the hill right before they got back to the pasture up towards the barn.  There was no stopping her though-and when she got to me she lunged up into my arms.  I turned her around so she could see the amazing sight of 140 sheep, coming to a complete stop!  It sounds weird I know, but it was one of the coolest things to see 140 sheep running up behind your little 5 year old, with 3 boys driving them from behind, and seeing them come to a sheer stop at the sound of their shepherd's voice and the roadblock.  I only wish I had gotten my camera out in time to capture the awesomeness of the moment!  Teagan looked back and was almost proud of her accomplishment in avoiding being  trampled.  "That's amazing Mom" she said.

The kids learned all about the workings of being a real shepherd and the responsibilities that accompany.  James even asked Brad if he wanted any help with anything while we were there.  Brad was impressed with the kids questions, their manners, enthusiasm and maturity.  I told him about Lil' James' passion for animals and his work ethic.  Brad said he'd love to hire James as some cheap labor.  I can't wait for that day! 

The biblical parallels that were drawn throughout the entire experience were overwhelming.  My thoughts naturally turned to Jesus our head shepherd.  I was compelled to think of David and what the tune of his Psalms sounded like and the calming effect they must have had on the herd, the sheep's response to their master's voice, the young children being trained by the hands of their family shepherds, did Jesus have a pet lamb?, the lost sheep of our body...so many things to apply to our own lives.  It was a biblical experience that could only be obtained when interacting with the shepherd and his flock on the level that we did. 

What a blessed day!  What a blessed experience!  I want to take everyone I know!

My little shepherds returned, glorifying and praising God for all the things they had heard and seen, which were just as they had been told.

Life's Science

3 kids, some good friends, 3 binoculars, 1 bucket, 2 bug nets, 3 pairs of kids gardening gloves, some sort of scooping device,  stale bread, a love for nature, and an awesome God- are all the things you need for a home schooling day's expedition at the Nature Preserve.

E is for speckled Egg shell we found along the shore of one of the Ponds.
X is for the eXcellent adventure that was had by all.
P is for the Ponds and Protected animal sanctuary that we explored for a few hours.
E is for the Egret casting it's huge shadow as it flew over us.
D is for the 5 baby Ducks that we fed some stale bread.
I is for Ireson spitting into the water off of the bridge to attract the fish. 
T is for bat Turds we found in the pavilion- namely guano.
I is for Insects- dragon flies, damsel flies and too many other pesky critters that I hope the bats enjoy for dinner.
O is for Opossum foot prints in the mud!
N is for No camera to take pictures of the fantastic day.  Tisk tisk to the Mama for that one.  Oops.

In addition to all that we also saw:

Red Winged Blackbirds, Robins, Black-Capped Chickadees, Gold-Finches, Purple Finches, Blue Birds, King Fishers and various ducks and water fowl that we haven't been able to categorize yet.

Fish galore! Frogs, turtles, and red waterlilies.

Tadpoles- "a bugazillion" Teagan said-to be more precise.  We brought some home to raise ourselves and I have lesson plans for the next month or so to go along with their metamorphosis.

Animal Tracks- deer, racoon, and opossum, and numerous human shoe and foot prints.

Bird Tracks- Blue Heron, Geese, and Egret prints under the water.

Hundreds of snake holes and animal burrows.

God's awesome design in all of it!  What a great day!!!

Sing-er-Son

Ireson loves to make up songs as of recent.  His inflections are a hoot!  Here's his latest jingle.

Holding Hands in the Parking Lot
Holding Hands in the Parking Lot
Staying Safe When Cars are Not

(wait fot the big finish....)

HOLDING HANDS IN THE PARKING LOT!

Baby Love My Baby Love...

                                                                                     Baby Ben spent the day with us over at Grandma and Grandpa's house the other day.  He's rather smitten with James.  James is tickled that he can actually carry Ben around and pick him up.  Ben was even giving James raspberries and sucking on his chin!  He said he can't wait until Ben's big enough to wrestle!  Grandma was holding him at church yesterday and James went over to say Hi and Ben let out a loud "Coo", grabbed James' face as if to pull him in for a big, wet, drooley kiss.

James informs me that "our next baby needs to be a black baby because they're the cutest!"  I told him that we had already tried 3 times to have a black baby but Daddy and I just can't breed black. 

Insight

Teagan:  "Daddy- You're crazy!.....but that's okay because Mommy likes crazy people."

Pause it!

I was driving all over today and Lil' James and I were having a conversation about something or other and Teagan couldn't get a word in edge wise.  It was true roll reversal.  Anyhow, she was trying to get our attention and in so doing yelled:  "Mom!  James!  PAUSE IT!"  I stopped talking and laughed.  "Now listen!  Look over there it's a deer!, she said with relief." 

I think I like "Pause it!" and shall use it as one of my own child hushing tactics.

A Dog's Life

The kids have their list of responsibilities/chores that they have to do before breakfast.  Making the bed, getting dressed, clothes on and/or put in the hamper, toys put away, teeth brushed, etc. along with letting the dog out and feeding her is.  It's a basic biblical principle.  The man who does not work, does not eat.  The dog doesn't get fed-you don't get fed.  Okay that second part is from the NBV (New Becky Version) but the principle still stands.

Most of the time Ireson will elicit the help of his brother or sister to help get the dog food.  Yet, this past week, Ireson has been more than happy to volunteer for the task and quite demanding that he feeds the dog all by himself.  I generally don't have to check that she's been fed her adequate amount because they're pretty reliable. He's especially good at taking notice of his furry friend and bestowing upon her an ample amount of hugs and kisses all throughout the day.  It's entirely too sweet. 

I went into the laundry room to put a load of clothes in and saw Lexi's bowl.  I had to chuckle when I saw the complimentary treat that Ireson left for her enjoyment.  Now it makes sense why he's wanted to feed her all week.  When I asked him why he was giving her a treat with breakfast (he usually always asks first before giving her one) he said:  "Because, Wexi just needed some more wove." 

It's the simple things in life-like the complimentary mint on your hotel pillow.

You Snooze You Schmooze

Today, I put Teagan and Ireson down for a nap.  I started baking some muffins and about an hour later Teagan decided to grace us with her grouchy presence.  I saw her come into my room with a look of consternation on her face.  I asked her why she was out of bed and she proceeded to plead her case.

"Mom, I couldn't sleep!" she retorted.

"Well, did you try to go to sleep?" I asked.

"Yes!  But I smelled something SO wonderful that I couldn't sleep!  If you weren't cooking down there something that smells so good then I could have fallen asleep!  So it's your fault.  See?"

"Really?"  I wasn't sure quite how to respond being that the whole house did smell wonderful and it was rather intoxicating.  I tried telling her "that Ireson was still asleep and it didn't seem to bother him."

"Well, that's because he was tired and it didn't "bother" me Mom, it just made me have to get up and go eat whatever you're making.  So (then she looked at me with eye brows raise, head tilted and a good pause as though to wait for my response and then she paused some more)  What did you make?"

She'd make a good attorney.  Since she couldn't snooze she tried to schmooze.
I guess I learned MY lesson.

Me & My Beany

My Jamaican sister Deanna came over for a visit with little Ben (Beany).  We are so in love with this kid.  I can't get enough of him!  He's just so yummy!  I had to share some pictures of him and his cousins. 

Multiple Personality Disorder

Ireson has been having a hard time with his behavior of recent.  He's been incredibly stubborn, selfish, strong willed (not necessarily bad) and well sinful.  He's been intentionally provoking his brother and sister until he gets his own way and constantly yelling...just plain nasty I tell you!  He's been spending a lot of time in the corner, his bed or time-out in general.  Anyhow, I was lying down with him in his bed the other day to discuss his behavior and to do some prayer time with him to ask for some much needed help and guidance. 

I said "You're having a really hard time being a child of God lately.  You have a lot of anger on your heart and you're not being very nice.  You're being quite the little Crabberson."
He looks at me behind his scowl and evident anger of being secluded AGAIN and grunts, "NO I NOT A CRABBERSON." 
Then began the back and forth banter: 
"Are you a Stinkerson?"
"No, I not a Stinkerson eeder."

"Are you a Braterson?"
Trying to hide the giggles- "No, I not a Braterson."

"Are you a Maderson?"

"No (pause), well yes, sometimes I a Maderson but no I not a Maderson right now.  (Deep sigh as though to succumb to the defeat)  Mom- I just.  I just- a Boy-son."

Well, I'm glad we got that cleared up.

Failed Test

  I decided to give Lil' James a 1st grade standardized test.  I was torn on whether or not to bother since I think they are wrong at this stage of education.  I did it not so much to see how he was doing, but rather to see how I was doing and if there was something that I needed to work on with him and to make sure he and I were covering all the bases.  I thought it would be nice so he could see how he was progressing and where he is more advanced or lagging.  I didn't do it in the typical logistical and rigid testing way either.  We did a page or so of questions every day over a week.  I also think it's important to learn how to take a test since they will inevitably come across tests such as these throughout their lives: driver's license, college entrance, etc.

  Anyway, one of the reasons I'm an advocate for home schooling is so children aren't "taught the test" and public Ed is heavily based on "teaching to the test" as my many teacher relatives will testify.  I've heard so many complaints and frustrations, from many relatives and friends that are teachers (private, charter, and public), about how they feel trapped because they don't have a choice but to teach the test!  I've gained a different perspective from talking to them.  I feel incredibly blessed to have 6 close friends and relatives who are teachers in the system who are there to help at my beckon call!  I love that they are there for me to ask advice, teaching tactics, and glean from their wisdom.

While I was at a lengthy Dentist appointment recently, I read a Newsweek magazine and the entire thing was dedicated solely to the education system and the "error of its ways."  I read that whole thing cover to cover in the time I was there.  I wish I had asked to take it home.  I felt incredibly vindicated and reassurred in why I we are homes chooling in the first place!  I love it you come across those things that are so blatantly "in your face" reminding you of why you are doing what you're doing.  I couldn't believe how blatantly honest Newsweek was!

Anyhow,  I found it rather ironic that some of the questions in the test completely proved the point of why I think they are primarily pointless and an unneeded, added stressor.  For example, this was straight out of the test:

Directions:  Put the proper punctuation at the end of the following sentence.

I like to run and play outside

A -     .

B -     !

C -     ?

James responded with an excited:  "Oh, I LIKE to run and play outside-so that would have an exclamation point after it!"

Of course the test was simply looking for a period as the proper answer.  I'm assuming that because it doesn't say "love to play outside" is why they were looking for a period.

THEN- Lil' James said, "Well, if I'm saying it then why aren't there quotation marks on the outsides?"

HA!  Exactly!  Take that you dingy test makers!  It was a proud moment.  I didn't tell him that they wanted him to choose period because HE was absolutely right.

Another sample question in the reading comprehension section:

What do you do when you are happy?

A -      Laugh

B -      Cry

C -      Sit

You can probably see where this is headed.  James said, "Well, sometimes you laugh, but sometimes you cry like when you found out that Ireson wasn't going to die in the hospital."  Right you are my boy!  Of course they wanted him to answer laugh.  Oh well.  I love that he's learning to critically think! 

Otherwise, he did great on the test and we found a few things that we needed to review.  All in all, I think the test failed him. 

Now- back to the drawing board....

Ben came over for a visit and James lost his second top tooth the day after losing his first top tooth.

Pharaoh-ish ways

Lil' James' 2 top teeth have been very loose for a very long time.  The other night I was finishing up with brushing his teeth and it's like they were begging to be pulled out.  You can practically bend them over sideways.  So we decided to see if we could get them out that night.  Daddy and James sequestered themselves in the bathroom and worked at those teeth for over a half hour.  I was watching from the sidelines and commented that those teeth were stinkin' stubborn! 
"Yeah!  Like Pharaoh!  They're Pharaoh teeth."- he replied.  Naturally, we had to start singing: "Let my tooth go..." to the tune of "Let My People Go."  From this point on he's been asking everyone if they want to see his Pharaoh teeth.

Teagan and siblings were sitting and eating breakfast while I was talking to my Aunt Cindy on the phone one day.  She's a Coronary Care nurse and she was telling me how they had a patient code at work the other day and he died.  We saw Cindy later that day and Teagan relayed her concern to her by saying,
"Cindy!  Mommy said that you killed someone at your work yesterday!"

Privacy is overrated.

The other day the phone rang and James answered with his usual rhetoric:  "Ross Residence.  Who's calling, please?"  
Short pause followed by:  "My Mom?  Can you hold on a while she's going potty?"

Apparently I had to go and train him to be polite and all and in the process I forgot the part about full disclosure.  It could have been worse.

Volcano Science Experiment and the kids doing some Yoga moves at Circus Class.

James, Ireson and Lil' James are under there somewhere.

Brotherly Love

The other evening Ireson took a nap until almost 6pm.  I let him sleep that long because it was a late start on a much needed nap and respite for me.  Consequently, we didn't put him to bed until almost 9pm.  Meanwhile, James and Teagan went to bed at 8pm.  James past out almost immediately, Teagan shortly after.

Come about 9:30pm James and I hear doors closing and we figured Ireson was up.  We were watching a video so we gave it a few more minutes until we went to check to see what Ireson was doing.  James reluctantly got out of bed at 9:45pm and headed to the boys' room.  He comes back in a minute later and said with minor comical annoyance- "Beck, we're missing a kid."

The search was on.
Where was Ireson and what was the little Stinkerson doing?  I figured he was in the bathroom getting a drink of water or sitting on the potty seat- but no such luck. 

I told James to check Lil' James bed.  He came back in chuckling and said, "Now that's too stinkin' precious- you've gotta come see this."

Sure enough- Ireson had climbed up into the top bunk with James and was passed out, upside down, shirtless.  James went and grabbed the camera and we tried a bunch of different shots to document the darlings.  I'm surprised the flash didn't wake them up or the neighbors for that matter! 

After some minor bodily contortions on my part- I picked Ireson up and put him down in his own bed to avoid the kicking and hitting of others that happens in my children's sleep.  James and I have both been victimized by flailing body parts.

James has been known to go down and sleep with Ireson in the bottom, double sized bunk, to help his brother out when he gets scared.  I thought it was soooo cute that Ireson climbed up with his sleeping brother rather than stayed down below with his dog.  Oh well, sometimes you just need a brother's love instead.

Poop-erson

Today- Ireson pooped on the potty.  After breakfast, he approched me with with a grimace and said in a husky voice, "Mom, my belly hurts and it feels like I maybe have to go poop." 

He's been showing me more signs that he's interested and ready these past couple of weeks.  So this past week we've been discussing alot more about listening to his body and trying to understand what it is his body is trying to tell him. 

So he sat on the potty, requested I get him his Bible to read, and commensed with the process. 

James, Teagan, and I were sitting at the kitchen table doing school work when we heard a loud splash.  Padon the graphic nature of this post...but it's exciting!  We all looked up in amazement, looked at him and started to laugh and scream with joy!  Ireson was giggling and blushing.  I ran in there and gave him a kiss and he looked up at me with his big Eeyore eyes and said, "Can I have my present now?!"

I stocked up on Match-box cars and airplanes for $1 each for this occasion and I've been telling him about them for weeks!  I went and got him one to unwrap and he was elated.  We called Daddy to share the news, and he's told everyone that has called today as well.

We're off to a great yet stinky start!